Myth of Sisyphus

I loved Sir Tim's (my World Literature professor) discussion about this essay (if I'm not mistaken) last Thursday. I agree with him in almost every argument he laid. When I was in my first to second year in college here in UST, there were a lot of times when I question myself why am I doing the same old things everyday (probably because I'm not yet convinced why I took up Tourism, why Tourism). Same old routines, same old lame activities.

I remember those nights when I used to go up at the rooftop of the dorm late at night, (I sometimes bring with me my guitar, a pen and a paper) past midnight sometimes, not only to escape for a moment my hell on earth but also to wonder and ponder about lot of things. I would see the bright street lights, the untiring España road, the empty jeepneys who have about two or three passengers. I would see people pass by, most either beggars (carrying a human-sized plastic bag containing human race's garbages) or girls (wearing dresses your mom would most likely not allow you to wear). Hmm. Thoughts run through my mind, a lot of why this, why that, why like that, that are left unanswered, I, too, even questioned God's existence for quite sometimes. I don't believe in religion, in general. Live your life justly and never treat others meanly, that's my principle. I very rarely go to mass, I don't read the bible (I even have lots of question about our bible). -Right. Enough of my anti-religion thoughts, back to the real topic. Those beggars, those biatches loitering the chilly street late at night, I wonder, have they ever thought,when they were just a kid, that they'll be what they are now? Did they have the idea? And if the thoughts of these kind of 'ventures' really did crossed their minds, will they do something about it, will they be willing enough? Made me realize how fortunate I am, I was. Anyhow, the discussion ended with a question: "What really is your, my, our purpose in life?"

Well, have a temporary answer to that question. Temporary, because I think time will come when I will be shifting thoughts in the future.  I think I'll find that out when I'm on my death bed, about to die maybe, I have an idea of doing an accounting of all the things I've done, the remembered ones. Or was that even an answer to that question? Or maybe there really is no answer to it. One may try to solve it with mathematical equations, try to make the best computer program to give answer to it. But no, you'll still find loopholes that will fall back or lead you to the very main question, what is your purpose in life? Not based on you faith and your hope. I don't know. I'd better leave that question in me and discover the answer to it, myself as time grows old and as trees begin to lose its leaves. (November 2008)